


Cuddle Monsters

by sikily



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi, SKAM Secret Santa, also ao3 formatting is killing me for the billionth time, this is a christmas fic with a dash of magic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-24 10:47:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13212168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sikily/pseuds/sikily
Summary: One spoke of true love and the other a critic,But Christmas would be the day to believe in magic,A wink of his eye and a tilt of his head,And Isak became a believer instead.* CHEESE, CHEESE AND MORE CHEESE w/ the occasional pick up line





	Cuddle Monsters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Julieseven](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Julieseven/gifts).



> Hiya ^^ This is my secret santa gift for Julieseven~! I thought I'd try to bring in some fluff for your holidays <3 I hope you like it!  
> I hope you're having a holiday season filled with oodles of joy *^.^*
> 
> Note: This fic follows the verses of a poem called “A Visit from St. Nicholas” by Clement Clarke Moore, but some of the verses have been modified to fit the progression of this story. I’m not a poet and only the modified verses belong to me. Honestly you should read the verses just to laugh at my attempt lmao

_'Twas the night before Christmas, when all thro' the house_

_Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;_

    

     Of course, this house (erhm, apartment) also happened to be deserted ‘cept for a tiny little fluff in a cage, more fur than solid body. Pepe the hamster had his paws tucked neatly beneath his fluffy little body and a sunflower seed stuffed in his cheek pouch. Like his owner, Pepe was prone to hiding away his food. Whereas Pepe had a nice little cheek pouch, his owner was much too skinny for such a nice cheek pouch, and sometimes Pepe chastised him quietly for that. Instead, the 19 year old had made a habit of hiding his snacks in rooks and crannies around his shared apartment, safe from the paws of his nosy roommate Eskild, his health-conscious bestie-turned-housemate Noora, and the ever-hungry Linn.

His owner, you see, happened to be a grumpy little university student currently quietly bemoaning his life choices as he laid on the ground just beyond those apartment doors, wishing with all his might that Pepe could magically grow hands to open the door for him. What’s a guy to do to get himself a nice carton of cookies ‘n cream ice cream on this wintery, festive night? Darn it if it meant he had to gorge out there in the hallway, he had every right to wallow in the sweet treat.

Isak picked at the loose threads of his tattered, beat up T-shirt, gnawed on cuticles red and stinging whenever he put pressure on them. When had he become the stereotypical Biochemistry major nerd with no social life, eating away his sorrows with ice cream and Netflix?

It wasn’t like he _couldn’t_ have gone out, had he wanted to, right? Eskild had invited him out to the club, and Noora had invited him to their girls’ night sleepover even though /girls’ night/ had been a pretty strict rule. And although Linn had gone home to spend the holidays with her aunt, neither had complained the last time Eskild had invited their entire apartment to their place for Easter breakfast.

The thing was… Isak was feeling restless tonight, for some reason. And there really was only one reason he would be this uneasy without any obvious cause. He pulled his knees up to his chest as he heard the first roll of thunder break through.

 

_The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,_

_In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;_

 

     Even sighed as he looked at the lone little stocking over his electrical fireplace, the big sewn letter E looking back at him in mockery. Alone again this year, it seemed. The tall man bit back a yawn as he skimmed the kitchen cupboards for a quick microwavable dinner.

A Christmas carol was playing on the TV by the time Even had gotten his share of watery mashed potatoes and honeyed ham. Even didn’t have many options when it came to food, to be honest, much like his love life. It had been like that since he began dating. It just seemed like even if he fell in love, it never _fit_ right. Like Even was a puzzle piece with so many edges that anybody would fit one side, but nobody could be the key to every bit of him. Is it his fault that he learned to settle instead? If perfection doesn’t exist, should he still search for it?

At times, Even wonders if he’d want an epic, eternal love, like Romeo and Juliet. Would he ever be able to catch the eye of someone and just _know_? And even if he could, would he ever be able to give up his dreams to stay? Would he need to compare the love he had for his dreams, with the love for a soulmate? This time had been the fourth time he’d moved this year alone, and the third partner he had parted ways with in the name of his “dreams.” It would be the fourth film he had a part in, mostly acting as the PA of the director, but there was nothing Even would trade it for, not even for his last girlfriend Sonja. It hadn’t been a hard break up, really. Sonja was sweet and understanding and mature, and although her tendency to control every bit of his life to a tee really irritated him at times, he thinks that he was _fine_ with her. Simply fine. But his heart had never skipped a beat the same way it did when he looked at _him_.

Would he have any regrets if the ghost of Christmases past came to fetch him? The last time Even had had Christmas dinner with a loved one was when he was back in Canada, as his parents had emigrated there early on his younger years. His mother had made traditional turkey and cranberry sauce, had had Even licking his lips even after his third plate. Every year after that (his last year of high school), he had spent the beginning of the year prepping himself up for a different Christmas, one where he would be warm and satisfied. Somewhere deep in his heart, he may have noticed, that he was just looking for the same feeling he had when he was with the people he loved.

Were his expectations too low, or too high? Even let a bitter smile slip onto his face as he started collecting the trash to place outside for the garbage collection the next day. Would it be too sad to open up his own gift for himself as he ate the canned cranberry sauce?

“Isak?” As soon as he had opened his front door, black trash bag in hand, he caught a glimpse of the thin figure huddled into a ball in front of the doors of apartment 5B.

A pair of watery eyes looked up at him, almost glazed over, followed by a pair of ice-cream smothered lips. Messy hair framed Isak’s sweet face, and he looked so darn adorable that Even almost cooed. Almost.  

 Isak was in the middle of devouring his way through his second carton of ice cream when Even’s curious face made it into his vision. It was almost like the first time they had met:

 

_Isak’s roommates were nestled all snug in their beds,_

_Whilst nightmares of final exams plagued their heads_

 

     It was cliched, really, the way Even and Isak had met.

It was early one cold morning, December 7th, 2016, when Even decided he needed to finally get his shit together and move into the apartment he had been paying for even when he was finishing up a movie in Australia. He had his boxes labeled, sorted, and surprisingly organized for someone who rarely has much to carry around other than a backpack and a small suitcase. Staying put in one place was a concept that made Even anxious, this idea that he would need to find all his opportunities in one place. New York had been big, had been bursting at the seams with opportunity, but he had grown bored of the busy city, had itched to leave for a breath of fresh air. Sometimes it scared Even how badly he thirsted for new ideas, to capture the world fresh in each of his scenes. Even was easy going about many things in life, but that didn’t include his films. His ideas needed to be translated perfectly into film, each scene fitting and perfect to the story he wanted to tell. His need for perfection had stopped him from uploading content time and time again, so his rather popular youtube channel still had a staggering 1 video, a short film he had created from footage he had collected throughout his entire senior and college years. That was, until he dropped out. Even had not been one to be constrained to a classroom. But it looked like he’d have to try again, as he’d already accepted a part time student position for the next September at University of Oslo. A degree in film wouldn’t hurt.

It was weird being back in Oslo though, in a place his parents had met and fallen in love. It was here that he remembered spending his younger years, learning to walk inside a small apartment so tattered he could vaguely glimpse  scenes of catching droplets of leaking water with a small bucket. He had taken great joy in watching the water droplets splatter.

Perhaps it was the fact that it was his first time coming back home after having left with his parents when he was 5. Norwegian was now almost foreign to his tongue, and he found himself thinking first in English. It was familiar territory in an industry that was always changing. And there was a charm to Oslo, a kind of mysterious charm that Even felt was missing from his collection of short clips. Sometimes he wondered if this familiarity was because you leave a piece of yourself everywhere you go, and he was just collecting the one he left here long ago.

Maybe, even, he was here to find a missing piece of him he’d yet to encounter.

He had spent the better of his morning hauling boxes of cassettes and DVDs from the moving truck he had rented to the apartment complex on the 5th floor, having had his parents ship all his more treasured items to a family friend’s house in Oslo. Albeit the freezing temperature outside, he had shed his thick padded jacket to more comfortably move between his apartment and the side entrance. Loose-limbed and sore, he had laid flat out on the floor of his apartment, counting the stars spinning in his tired mind. A fresh beginning. This time, a permanent one. He was no longer going to drift from school to school, city to city, seeking inspiration instead of creating his own. His break up with Sonja had been a wake up call, and her warning had replayed in his head like a broken cassette: “You settle for everything else other than your films, Even. You were _fine_ , so you settled with me. But that doesn’t mean you’re happy. Please start paying attention to things you care about that aren’t about your films. Love yourself a bit more, too, please.”

With a sigh, Even pulled himself out from his thoughts, as he oftentimes got lost in his own mind and couldn’t find an exit. He would need to grab some lunch before his growling stomach protested some more, and maybe a coffee to calm his tired mind. There was still a lot of cleaning up to do even if he had gotten everything inside the apartment.

There was a small café near his apartment complex, strangely without a name anywhere in the storefront, and Even found himself walking inside before he could even stop himself. Colourful liquid chalk artwork decorated the glass windows, painting the interiors of the shop in hues of reds and pinks and blues and yellows, and leaving Even intrigued.

An amber-haired, grinning girl looked up from the cashier as he stepped in, bells jingling. There was soft piano music playing in the background, and the scent of fresh bread had Even salivating. On the board above the bar, the menu was handwritten with white chalk on a blackboard, the font large and clean and unusual in its design. Even vaguely remembered seeing this elegant font on Microsoft word, and he believed it had been called ‘Eva.’

The cashier smiled at him, spinning a pink sharpie on her index finger. “Good morning! Anything I can get you today?”

“Mmm…” Even gave the menu a quick glance, “Just a large coffee please, and your lunch combo set A.”

“Of course!” She replied cheerily, the gold font of her nametag, _Eva_ , reflected prettily in the dim lights, almost as bright as the smile she had on her face. “The set comes with your choice of a beverage as well, would you just want to upgrade the medium coffee to a large?”

“I’ll take a medium coffee with the set and a large coffee on the side as well.”

“Long day?” Eva asked, laughing as she punched in the codes of the items.

“I just moved in this morning so… I can’t imagine anything being settled till the end of this week,” Even sighed, giving her a tiny smile. She returned it warmly, asking for his name and writing it on his receipt as she motioned for him to take a seat.

By the time Even was settled in and actually digging into his food, a group of university boys walked through the door, a bustling group of laughter and loud chatter. Even kept an eye on them as he sipped his coffee, noticing that one of the boys, with particularly pronounced eyebrows and dense curly hair broke out from the group to lean forward and place a small kiss on the forehead of the cashier.

She rolled her eyes and gave his hair a pat before turning back to the coffee bar. Even’s eyes trailed from the cashier’s boyfriend to the group that followed behind him, whooping and laughing at the display of affection from the couple.

“So soft!!!” A taller, blond-haired boy shouted, pouting in jealousy. “Where’s Vilde?”

“In the office, stress-pulling out her hair because Mahdi decided he’d eat all the pastries he bakes instead of putting them in the display.”

“I will never understand how the three of you got the idea to open a café together.”

Even zoned out the conversation as his eyes drifted towards the end of the group, gaze falling on the last boy in the group. He had been one of the tallest of the group, probably nearly hitting the 6-foot mark, but he was skinny, small framed compared to the other boys, and curled into himself like a cat with its shackles raised. Loose golden curls peaked out from under his snapback, the ends dusting the tips of his ears and curling about his nape.

Almost just as Even’s eyes wandered to look at the gentle silhouette of the boy’s long eyelashes, and he wondered about the colour of his eyes, the boy turned to look at Even, and those pale green eyes met Even’s own blue ones. Their eye contact held for a second longer than normal for strangers meeting eyes in a café, and Even could see a light dusting of pink trail up the boy’s neck to the apple of his cheeks, before the boy quickly broke eye contact. Even grinned when the boy merely stared at the ground, momentarily being unable to resist and peeking up at Even from underneath his lashes.

How _adorable_.

Just as the group began ordering, Even smoothly picked up his finished coffee and strode up to stand behind the group, tall frame sticking out like a sore thumb in the line.

“Oh! Even! How can I help you?” Eva started, waving off her friends that were jokingly complaining.

“Ah, I just thought I’d return the cup” He passed the white DIY mug back to Eva over the counter. “And order another drink.”

“Thanks! What would you like?”

Even turned to the boy now beet red, staring at his feet as Even tilted his head and bent down to look directly into the boy’s eyes.

“What would you like to drink?”

-

His name was Isak and he had flailed embarrassingly when his loud friend, Magnus, had whooped before proceeding to march into the kitchen to pull their equally excited friend, whom Even assumed was Mahdi, to come out and also watch the scene unfold.

“I- umm, Isak.” He had responded instead, and slapped himself on the forehead as Eva broke out into giggles.

“Well, Isak, I’m Even. Are we skipping the flirting over coffee to first-name basis so quickly?” Isak harrumphed loudly, pushing his friends away as they cheered on the two. He crossed his arms across his chest, but still avoided eye contact with Even.

“Iced latte. And it’s Mr. Valtersen for you until we’re done flirting over coffee.”

 

_And Even in his towel and I in my cap,_

_I stumbled about, like any lovestruck sap,_

 

     Even had insisted on walking Isak back to his university campus after lunch that day, more than intrigued by the shy boy hiding behind a grumpy exterior. Isak was gentle and rough around the edges at the same time, soft and funny and sarcastic. He was a nerd and a dork and had a hard time hiding it from Even even as they chatted about Isak’s friends loudly because the group was chortling about _them_ a couple of tables over. Magnus kept calling them cute loudly, and ended up pulling his girlfriend Vilde out to fangirl with. Isak had retaliated by loudly, and very meticulously, described that one time Magnus had suggested that a girl going down on him had a cat’s tongue. Even had never laughed so hard in his life, cackling as the mischievous twinkle in Isak’s eyes sparkled with laughter. Even was having such a good time with Isak that it wasn’t until he was walking back to his apartment that he remembered that _no_ , Isak and him hadn’t known each other for years, and that _fuck_ , he forgot to ask for his number.

He went to sleep that night with a heavy heart, and Isak’s smile still in his mind’s eye.

A couple of days later, Isak had received a text from an unknown number that had him smiling the entire time throughout his lab, prompting his fellow TA (and best friend), Sana, to steal his phone in the break room.

 

**Unknown number: I owe your friends 1 pizza for every digit in your number.**

**Me: Is my number that cheap?**

**Unknown number: I have to make up the rest to you instead ; )**

~

Propping his takeout box between his hip and the off-white door frame, Isak had a stack of students’ papers clamped to his left side, a cup of steaming coffee in hand, was sifting through all of his pockets for his keys with the other hand, and a sick hamster’s cage hanging off his pinky and middle finger. He knew he was being a bit paranoid, but he hadn’t felt comfortable putting Pepe’s cage on the floor when he knew the little guy made a habit of putting whatever he could inside his mouth.

It was only 10 in the morning and he was already having a terrible day. He hadn’t gotten home till 03:00 in the morning, finally having finished his double shift at the lab. On his way home, he had remembered that he had a bunch of year 1 test papers to grade so that they could update everybody before the mock midterm the next day. He ran home only to discover that the papers were nowhere to be found, as he had stuffed it quickly into his locker the week before and had forgotten completely about it.

Having finally fallen into a fitful sleep, he awoke to a screeching cry at nearly 06:00 in the morning, only to find that Pepe had found himself hungry enough to grab onto Isak’s laminated papers from behind the cage bars, and had gnawed his way through the corner of a 30-page stack of paper and plastic. The screeching cry had been the hamster wheezing early into the morning, and a panicked Isak had barely changed out of his sleeping shirt before he was grabbing a cap in an effort to control the mass of curls atop his head and running out the door with nothing but his credit card, keys, phone, and Pepe.

Luckily, Pepe’s vet had seen enough cases like this, and the clinic was open early enough for Isak to have made sure Pepe was okay (with a complete checkup) before he started heading home.

So needless to say, he was having a terrible day. Usually, Isak never took evening shifts, always preferring to work late night till morning, being the night owl he was. He had picked up an earlier shift however, at the request of his best friend, and forever lab buddy, Sana (whom had a very important dinner planned for herself and her fiancé Yousef). The two had been friends for years before it ever occurred to the two of them that maybe it would be possible for the two of them to work on a relationship. Of all things, Isak wished that the two would be a pair of friends-turned-lovers that worked out, much unlike Jonas and himself.

Well. It was more of him developing a crush on Jonas while Jonas had always been enamored by Eva. It was a long story for another time, but oftentimes, Isak found himself looking back at those times with a sort of bittersweet feeling. He wasn’t quite sure whether it was regret for the younger Isak that had trouble embracing his attraction to other boys, or the fact that this struggle had led him down a path where he hurt everybody he loved.

It had become a dark time for him, a time where he spent more time wallowing in confused sadness and bitterness, and had a hand in creating the sarcastic little shithead that probably all of his friends endearingly called him.

Now, an older Isak hadn’t improved much, instead choosing to use his meaner side as both a crutch and a shield against a world that he had just started to accept. It had been hard trying in the beginning, forcing him into a corner where he simply explored and experimented with barely any emotional attachment, and that corner was a place he enjoyed, until his first heartbreak at least.

Isak had always pretended to not care, put up a nice little protective bubble that was much more easily popped than expected. He hadn’t known how easily he fell until he had fallen. His name had been Erik, and he had one of the most charming grins Isak had ever seen. Unfortunately, he hadn’t been the only one to think so, and Erik knew.

“Need help over there?” A deep voice startled Isak out of his thoughts (which had spiraled out of control, as usual), and Isak whipped around at the familiar voice to look up into the same mysterious sea-blue eyes he had been thinking about for the past week. Scratch that about Erik having the most charming grin in the world, Isak thought quietly, blinking dazedly over at Even. Man, how did he get his hair so perfectly styled even when it was clearly wet?

And gosh, did he always have such broad shoulders? How could Isak have thought that the awkwardly long limbs of Even’s weren’t perfectly proportioned? Just looking at the way he seemed like a model with nothing but a towel-

“Towel!” Isak made the terrible mistake of lifting his arm just as he responded to Even with ‘towel’ in the same tone he would have said ‘yes, please.’  Isak’s jaw dropped as his papers fluttered about around him in their descent to the ground. How is it possible for Isak to be so shy even after the two of them had been very obviously flirting in their texts?

It’s true the two of them had yet to meet up again, with Isak attributing it to bad, stormy weather, but the two of them weren’t exactly hiding the fact that they were interested in each other. They had found out within a couple of days that they lived in the same apartment complex, sharing a chuckle over that coincidence before letting the topic rest. Who would’ve known that they had quite literally ended up as next door neighbours?

Even chuckled under his breath, a slight pinkening of the apples of his cheeks being the only thing betraying his embarrassment.

“Looks like I didn’t use my mom’s birthday as the pin after all,” Even mused, already having collected Isak’s papers into a pile and tucking it into his side as he reached for Isak’s coffee and takeout box. Just as Isak finally dug his keys out of his skinny jean pocket, he realized the keys were stuck to the inside of his pocket with something almost resembling bubble gum…

Isak considered it a victory when the key finally pulled free, hoping to all dear deities that it hadn’t looked like what it was: that he was most likely the grossest boy alive. Maybe he should have used that lavender body mist Eskild had recommended him after all.

However, as the keys slipped past his fingers onto the floor, Isak quickly bent down to retrieve it, mentally scolding himself for being such a klutz, he felt a weight lift from his head, and his curls spilling over to take over his head in a messy heap once again.

Great, Isak thought, both a klutz and a hot mess.

“Who would have thought that we had been this close all along!” Even laughed, delighted by the coincidence as he watched the telltale sign of a shy Isak by the pinkening of his neck and cheeks. “How’s Pepe? I never got an update after this morning.”

“He’s okay. I think he was choking or something this morning and woke me up, so I had to take him to the vet.” Isak shrugged, finally getting his door open. He popped the keys onto their keyholder next to the door, but turned back to look at Even, not quite interested in being alone today after all. Screw sleep when you have Even practically naked, and looking at you like _that_.

“Oh, is he better now?”

“Yeah, just-just a bit fat though. Magnus almost thought he was a guinea pig.”  

Isak had always thought it was kind of stupid when it happened on tv, but yeah… words were falling from his mouth, but he didn’t really know what he was saying. He wonders briefly whether Even understands him at all.

“I think he’s cute, like his owner.” There was a teasing twinkle in Even’s eyes as he winked, completely drawing Isak in and not letting him go. Maybe it’s the magic of the holidays coming by early.

Isak sputtered in reply, head spinning faster than Pepe’s wheel had ever gotten.

Even was mouthing something to him, full lips still pulled into a lopsided grin.

“Wh-what?” Isak’s game had never been so bad before! But Even’s gaze was making him feel a wee bit dizzy.

 “I think we need to sit down at a coffee shop to discuss your inappropriate use of memes, Isak. That poor hamster has to live up to some insane expectations.”

Isak never asked about why Even would step out of his apartment in nothing but a towel anyways, but a couple of days later, Even had knocked on his door to return a letter to him, claiming that the mailman had mistakenly placed it into his mailslot instead. Not that Even had been sifting through his mail after his shower when he discovered a letter addressed to Isak in his pile, and had rushed out to return the letter to his next door neighbor in hopes of seeing Isak.

~

Isak had never fallen as quickly or as deeply as he did with Even.

And now he understood how enamored Jonas was with Eva. How there was no way he could have been able to butt into that relationship. He was starting to imagine a future for himself and Even in his mind, and suddenly it seemed like it was the only possible future for him. Something about Even’s comfortable chatter drew the tired from Isak’s bones and gave him energy instead.

But he was so scared, so scared of letting himself dream and having the reality of his situation crash down on the two of them unexpectedly.

Jonas and Eva had sat him down for one of their notorious “talks” one night after the café closed, and Isak really needed to focus on finishing that paper he promised his professor about the phase separation behavior of supercharged proteins and polyelectrolytes. He would be a fool to head home only to spend hours listening in on when there was even the slightest of noise from his next door neighbour’s door. And even when they missed each other then, the two always found an excuse to visit. It was getting so bad that Noora would leave the door ajar and walk away quickly after answering the door, simply not having the time to stay for an excuse after Even’s visited the third time that week, _still_ asking to borrow sugar.

“Isak? Isak, are you listening to us?”

Isak gave his best friends his best serious face, pursed lips and everything. “O-of course, Eva, I completely agree.”

“… Eva asked you when you would be jumping Even’s bones for some.” Jonas added humourously, trying desperately and failing to hide his smirk.

“I… we’ve never really done anything more than hug.” _Not that I don’t want to._ In a sense, it bothered Isak that Even was always so gentlemanly with him (when he wasn’t teasing him with those quips and tousles of his hair – god those gentle tousles-)

And it certainly wasn’t that Isak wasn’t _feeling_ anything. The atmosphere was always thick and heavy when Isak was with Even, like he couldn’t breathe until just something happened. When their shoulders were inches apart, as they cruised the supermarket for some drinks and frozen food.

 _‘That’s a brand name one.’_ Isak remembers teasing cheekily, putting Even’s instant steak (like, really???) on Even’s side of their cart. Isak’s had his fair share of instant food, and he’s never quite met someone that could find something healthy in the pile of junk in the instant food isle.

 _‘What? Surprised by my sugar daddy eligibility?’_ Even was always so flirty, always seemingly toeing that line between friends and lovers. He’d casually throw around cheesy pick up lines, and flirtatious comments, but what really got Isak was the way he’d look carefully into Isak’s eyes, so meticulous as he gently brushed a curl behind Isak’s ear. What made Isak weak in the knees was the way Even would never fail to tell when Isak was having a hard day, and the way in which Even would never be the first to let go in their hugs.

“Lord have mercy, there’s that look again.” Eva sighed, plopping down a leftover muffin onto Isak’s saucer.

It wouldn’t be the first time Isak has heard about _the_ look from his friends. Surprisingly, it had been Mahdi that was the first to ever comment on it, usual gleaming, sunshine smile on his face as he wiped his hands down to take the seat opposite Isak that one morning. Isak had spent almost the entire night prior texting Even bizarre memes he found online, and giggling when a half-awake Even pretended to be annoyed even as he sent Isak cute emoticons in reply.

_‘Oh man, it’s that look again.’_

_‘What look?’_ Isak had inquired dumbly, finally placing his phone down the first time that day.

Mahdi had only shaken his head for several seconds before answering. _‘The look that tells me you’re equally as hopeful as you are hopeless.’_ _Hopelessly in love, and hopeful for the future._

“Isak, are you happy?” Jonas asked quietly, voice stern.

Isak thinks back to the feeling of sitting on the back stairwell with Even, both with an earbud in as they listen to Even’s playlist, both content with feeling like they are the only two in this world. And suddenly his mouth feels like it’s cotton, and he couldn’t find any words to express how he feels. _Happy_ suddenly feels like an understatement.

“Are you going to tell him? You can’t hide this forever.” Eva looks worried as she picks at her cuticles. Isak fidgets under their combined gazes. It’s a part of himself he can’t quite face himself yet.

What if he drives Even away? Being with Even means being with home itself. Even brings Isak a sort of warmth and comfort that he’s never felt even in his own skin. How could he dare bring discomfort and fear to Even instead?

What if he can never feel as warm as he does when Even wraps him up in his arms again?

But then again, what are they if Isak’s always running and hiding? When he can’t explain disappearances and unusual behaviours?

Isak shakes his head at Jonas and Eva’s disapproving furrows of their brows. “He might not like me anyways.”

~

Even sought only two things in life – happiness and art. And Isak was both. His muse and his smile and his excuse for rolling around in bed in peels of laughter.

He always worried about being loved just that right amount, and loving just the right amount, but for once, it seemed like all he wanted to do was smother Isak in all his love. Even couldn’t help but ask himself. Is this love? The way he couldn’t stop smiling around Isak, could barely resist the urge to reach out and run his thumb across those reddened cheeks. His heart felt so full, bursting at the seams with a kind of happiness he had yet to be fully acquainted with.

They had easily fallen into a pattern, an unusual, but fairly pathetic pattern where the two of them would open their doors as slowly as possible, waiting to see if the other may pop out to pretend they were accidentally bumping into each other, and end up chatting the day away and spending it with each other.

Could love be perfect the way Even had always wished it to be? Or would it be okay to be like the two of them – simply comfortable and warm and happy? If Even is content and happy and comfortable, does he really need an epic kind of cinematic love story?

Besides, even if he had never felt as good about a relationship, what about Isak?

Something was still amok, and Even could feel it in the pit of his gut. Isak would sometimes grow skittish and be touchy and close with Even, only to quickly realize what was happening and pull back. Sometimes he would be looking over his shoulder, rushing their meeting and biting his lip in nervousness when he thought Even wasn’t looking.

And on certain days, it would seem that he had disappeared altogether. He wouldn’t reply texts, wouldn’t pick up calls, and Isak’s housemates always shared a knowing look when Even dropped by with Isak’s favourite snacks. Isak had always said that he was fine when Even asked, but the boy was a terrible liar, and Even quickly saw through that façade.

Defining their relationship was another obstacle altogether. Isak was hesitant to break what they had and Even didn’t want to end up heartroken again. Sometimes they were so close to uttering the couple of words rhat would make them boyfriends.

When Isak would grin innocently up at Even, or even when Even tousled Isak’s hair casually.

 

Neither of them had been brave enough to ask the other to spend Christmas with them, assuming that they would have previous engagements. Who knew that they’d both end up in the same hallway, together, exactly how they wished they could have been?

This Christmas seemed to workin’ its magic for this couple though, for it was that Christmas eve that finally, everything changed.  

Even’s brows furrowed as he noticed the younger boy curled into himself, huddled so small and wound so tightly that he was afraid Isak might shatter if he were to touch him. “Issy? Are you okay? You\re looking sort of pale.”

Isak tried to play it off as soon as he heard the worry in Even’s voice, but his voice trembled and his body shook with energy. “Just forgot my keys so I’m locked out, and I’m a bit sick today too. I just really want to be at home.” He whispered sadly.

Even didn’t know why Isak was adamant about being alone when it seemed like he was so ill that he may be better off with someone that could watch over him. “Why don’t you come in? Our balconies are close enough together for you to just step across! I’ll lift you over.”

After a moment, Isak nodded slowly, getting up on wobbly legs but still refusing Even’s touch. Even tried to lighten the mood as he entered his house slowly after Isak. “Wow! We’re lucky it has yet to rain even though the thunder and lightning has been going crazy for a while.”

Even had tries to his promise, insisting that he lift the weakened Isak over the balcony rail, but the younger boy insisted he do it himself, saying that he felt uncomfortable with Even even watching him do it. He ushered Even back inside with a reassuring smile, even as he caught a last glimpse at Even’s worried expression as the boy turned around to head back in.

 

_When out on the balcony there arose such a clatter,_

_I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter._

_Away to the window I flew like a flash,_

_Tore open the shutters, and threw up the sash.._

 

     As soon as Even turned away from the balcony, as Isak had insisted, he had turned right back around. There was a clatter, like the shattering of the pots he kept right on the balcony, as if something heavy had fallen against it.

_The moon reflected in the freshly frozen snow,_

_Gave the luster of mid-day to objects below;_

_When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,_

_But a miniature creature, trembling in fear._

 

     Even ran to the balcony door, tearing it open only to have heavy rain blur his vision. But then he saw it. He saw the little blue-green figure.

     It was a small creature, no larger than a little cat, with a cute nuzzle, 8 evenly spaced white whiskers and pointed ears. Even considered that it looked like a cross between a puppy and a cat. And most unusual was its fur colour and eyes – a cold electric blue tinged with green borders – twisting and turning like flames licking embers.

Even stood frozen for a second, eyes wide and jaws dropped. Was this… a ghost of an animal?

It was cowering out in the rain, twisting and turning with its shackles raised. It looked so cold out in the storm, and Even couldn’t stop himself from being reminded of Isak’s eyes when he saw those pretty green-tinged tips. He rummaged through his closet for the softest throw blanket and set it down in a warm corner of the room heated by two heaters he had placed there previously. It took a while for the creature to inch forward (and a soaked floor where Even left the balcony door open), where it nestled onto the blanket and set its wide, curious eyes upon Even. The animal’s eyes were a jade green, bright and mysterious and intelligent all in one gaze.

 

_With newfound familiarity, so lively and quick,_

_He kissed my cheek with a shy little lick,_

_Cautious little creatures as their legends explain,_

_Agitated by thunder and sensitive to rain._

 

Even made sure all his movements were slow and he tried his best to minimize his degree of movement, finding that the creature appreciated him setting down a bowl of milk, and the heater he had brought right to the animal.

The two, animal and human, settled into a relaxed sleep-daze, but not quite sleep, and Even observed the young animal cutely licking its paw.

Those curls of flame, light and free around the creature’s head and framing its little face like a lion’s mane… It couldn’t be? Could it?

It was getting late into the night when the animal suddenly let out a displeased yowl, a kind of weak little yawn accompanied by a stretch of its short limbs. Even was surprised when it came surging forward across the room and hopped directly onto Even’s shoulder, its flames surprisingly cold to Even’s skin.

A tongue licking the shell of his ear had him laughing, bringing up a hand to smooth it down the animal’s back. He swept a hand through the mass of soft blue-green curls.

Then it was jumping onto the floor again, backing up sufficiently before making a huge hop onto Even’s chest this time, knocking the boy back onto his butt before he swiftly jumped onto Even’s navel, snuggling close, curling into a little ball and promptly closing its eyes.

Even smiled, picking the animal up but still holding them close to transfer the two of them into the bedroom instead, cooing when the little creature whined deep in its throat at being moved.

 

_As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,_

_When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;_

_So up to the house-top the little raiju flew,_

_Body enflamed by silver and blue._

 

     It wasn’t until near crack of dawn when the thunder and lightning outside started to cease, and Even hadn’t slept all night. The little mass of flame was still warm and it was so tiny that its snores vibrated its entire body. A tail was wrapped tightly around Even’s bicep. Even felt crazy for suspecting something based only on those curls and green eyes, but he just couldn’t let the idea go.

If his suspicions were true, Even doubted that he was going to be getting answers right away.

Early morning rays had the little creature shifting uncomfortably, and before Even knew it, the creature had jumped off him and run to the open window, slipping out quickly and not sparing him even the briefest of glances.

 

_And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof_

_Prancing and pawing and then a tiny little “oof!”_

_As I drew in my head, and was turning around,_

_\- A shuffling, muffled footsteps and a knocking sound._

_He was dress'd in a hoodie, dripping wet,_

_Eyes as shy as when they first met._

_His lips opened but his voice refused sound,_

_Water droplets pitter pattering onto the ground._

 

     Isak looked frightened out of his mind, and so terribly small there behind the door. He was shaking so badly that Even wanted to wrap him in his arms and just hold him until he was warm and safe.

“I’ve only ever seen it being called the “Raiju” in Japan.” He said stiffly, “I’m sorry I wasn’t more honest with you even though I liked you so much.” _I didn’t want to be called a freak again_. This isn’t sexual, he had explained to his former boyfriend, and the boy had laughed at him and told him to meow.

“He was you, then?” Even asked evenly, and Isak didn’t miss the fact that Even didn’t address the animal as /it/ the same way he had. “Don’t be scared, Issy.”

Big droplets of tears started welling up in the shifter’s eyes, and those green eyes of the raiju – of Isak, stared hopefully at Even. “Do you hate it?”

“How could I ever hate you?” Even pulled Isak into a hug, one hand tugging gently through the strands of his hair while the other encircled his thin waist.

“But you’re going to have to explain this to me, okay?” Isak nodded obediently against Even’s chest, and as their breaths evened out, Isak didn’t worry about answers or questions or anything else as he just concerned himself with counting the soothing heartbeats of his loved one.

 

_Those eyes—how they twinkled! His smile: How sweet,_

_His cheeks were like roses, warmed by the fire’s heat;_

_His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,_

_And the messy curls upon his head soft as snow._

 

     Isak looked extra beautiful in the glow of the sunrise, so warm and soft and curious as they discussed the theory of parallel universes. Their legs tangled together underneath Even’s blankets, and Isak was curled into Even’s side. They looked at each other a lot when they talked, blue meeting green, and smiles gentle. Even shuffled Isak’s body until the boy lay parallel to him, confused little pout on his face.

“I was comfortable and warm,” he whined, curls so endearingly messy that Even went for it. He grasped Isak gently by his chin and tilted his face up till the up-close view of his favourite person in the world has his heart pick up speed in his chest. The first kiss was a gentle, tiny one, off center to the cute upturned corner of his Isak’s smile.

The second kiss was initiated by Isak, who wound his arms around Even’s neck and slipped into his lap.

They decided not to get up from bed that day, opting for a Christmas morning with kisses instead. Who needed a mistletoe? Isak looked warm and safe wrapped up in Even’s blankets, and gosh darn it, he’d do anything to keep him there.

 

_The mass of their blankets heavy and warm,_

_Butterflies in their tummies flying up a storm,_

_Few words were spoken but nothing left unsaid,_

_Just a lazy Christmas afternoon cuddling in bed._

 

Even learned very quickly that Isak was a blanket hogger. In his sleep, he’d roll and fidget until he was sufficiently wrapped up in a blanket burrito. He whined when Even would stick his hand into the mass to unroll him, and shivered when Even’s cold feet tangled with his own. There really was only one way around this, and Even was quite enthusiastic about this method too: Even would begin their nap by wrapping himself around the younger boy like an octopus, and pull Isak into his chest. The sufficiently warm boy would then spend the night just nuzzling into Even’s chest, and rarely moved around at all.

Isak learned even more quickly that sleeping Even was a force to be reckoned with. Even easily held conversations with Isak even as he was deep in sleep, and would sometimes hold entire conversations with Isak only to not remember the talk having happened at all after he woke up.

What really got Isak going though, was the fact that a touchy Even was ten thousand times even touchier in his sleep, and Isak didn’t know how much more his heart could take. Even in his sleep, sometimes Even would casually drop a kiss on Isak’s cheek, or brush a hand along the curve of Isak’s waist, or even run his foot up and down Isak’s calves.

So Isak always tried to fall asleep first, to save himself from the heart attack Even’s touches were promising.

Even never complained as he watched intently through adoring eyes, the way Isak’s eyelashes fluttered against his cheek, and the way Isak sometimes let out little stutter-breaths as he was nearing sleep.

 

_One spoke of true love and the other a critic,_

_But Christmas would be the day to believe in magic,_

_A wink of his eye and a tilt of his head,_

_And Isak became a believer instead._

 

“Love is such a stupid thing.” Isak matters, even as he wraps himself all around Even like an octopus. “So stupid and unrealistic.”

“Now, are you arguing that because you believe that or just because you want to argue with me?” Even adds, smiling as he pecks the tip of Isak’s nose.

“I’m arguing this so you can win and give me my punishment!” Isak proclaims shamelessly, tilting his chin upwards for his punishment kisses. _Not saying that I wasn’t once upon a time sick of hearing that word and listening to the people that believed in it._

Even’s laughs ring in his ears as the older boy swoops down to kiss him on the lips. “We have to stop calling kisses and nose nuzzles punishments just so we have an excuse to not stop doing them.”

“Hmm,” Isak climbs awkwardly over the blankets to straddle Even’s lap. Even’s arms immediately move forward to wrap around the slim waist pressing into his own. “I can think of a few newer punishments, if you’re up for it, Evie~”

Even wasn’t quite sure if he wanted to win or lose, or if he hadn’t been winning  all along.

 

_With hugs and cuddles and kisses galore,_

_The two asked for nothing much more,_

_Just a little bunny kiss and a sleepy smile,_

_And that they’d rather stay here for quite a while._

 

Even pecked Isak on the cheek. “Every time you roll your eyes, you owe me one kiss.”

“That’s cheesy and impossible! What happens when I’m out with the boys? I roll my eyes at every other sentence that comes out of Magnus’ mouth!”

“I guess that just means you’ll never finish owing me kisses!” Even grins, placing soft kisses along the purple-pink marks all along Isak’s collarbones and chest.

Even’s lips were hot on Isak’s skin, and he found himself shivering as Even worked his way down his chest to his navel. Even gently pecked Isak’s belly button before straightening up to find his boyfriend (Even’s chest puffed up just that tiny bit every time he thought of it) with his head hung low, and his curls hiding his face.

Gently tilting Isak’s face into view by a finger under his chin revealed a beet red Isak with pink ears and shy eyes.

“It just… It reminded me of curling up on your navel and how good it felt.”

 

_He sprung to his feet, phone alarm screeching in his hand,_

_Whilst I blearily bid goodbye to dreamland:_

_But I heard him exclaim, ere he disappeared from sight—]_

_“Call me; Call me tonight!”_

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading <3 
> 
> Note: I absolutely adore Eva's character in this fic :P She's an artist, created a font named after her AND owns a café with Vilde and Mahdi ^^
> 
> \- Raiju are Japanese mythological creatures also known as “thunder beast/animal.” They are usually made of lightning and take the form of a wolf, dog, fox, cat or weasel. (While commonly white and blue, it can also fly about as a ball of lightning)  
> They are generally believed to be harmless, ‘but during thunderstorms it becomes agitated and leaps about.’ Peculiarly, it is believed to enjoy sleeping in human navels.  
> (source: Wikipedia Raiju, liberties in regards to this mythological creature’s appearance and habits have been taken)


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